Decluttering on the surface seems like a simple task; just get rid of stuff. But anyone who has attempted it knows, it’s not that easy. Whatever it is about things, they are simple to acquire and hard to let go of. Those two things together lead to clutter. The biggest thing I’ve learned on this journey is that mindset is everything. Minimalism isn’t about the stuff, it’s about who you become. It is how your thinking shifts over time. When we can make those shifts it not only creates ease where there was none before but it allows us to really focus on what matters to us. So make decluttering easier with these five mindset shifts. They will help you get out from under all your stuff and start becoming who you want to be.
Remember, how you move through this process is yours. Maybe you’ll start off fast or very small. You might alter one area of your life and then start to notice it spill over into others. However you do things, know it IS a process. Real change takes time but trust it. And then one day suddenly, like it happened overnight, you’ll notice the way you think has changed. These shifts have never been gradual for me. The process of getting there is but the thinking just pops into place. And you release all the struggle (and stuff!) associated with your old thinking. ⠀
These shifts have never been gradual for me. The process of getting there is but the thinking just pops into place.
1. Scarcity
This was my biggest one. Worrying about having enough, feeling like I never had enough time or holding onto and hoarding things so we would have what we needed. But it resulted in us having too much. We really do live in an abundant world, so much of what we want is readily available to us but we get stuck in worrying it won’t be. Scarce thinking is deep in us. Maybe you grew up with little or your parents thought this way and imprinted it onto you. However it developed within you, you can definitely change it.
It’s important to learn that thinking with scarcity only makes things feel worse. Wishing you had more money and then thinking how hard it is for you to make more sucks. Wishing you had more money and looking for all the opportunities available to you to make more is empowering. Flipping your mindset to a more abundant perspective invites you to see opportunities and the choices you have available to you rather than dead ends.
And as it relates to decluttering, having a scarce mindset makes it harder. Harder to let go, creates the urge to hoard and buy when you see a good deal even if you don’t need it now (or at all). So practice being okay without. Let go of the items that are easier to replace first and remind yourself you will be okay. Practice telling yourself you can spend $20 to replace it if in two years you really need it. It is really freeing to recognize what you can do rather than what you can’t.
2. Lack
Similar to scarcity, this is focusing on what you don’t have. You don’t have enough money, clothes, a big enough house or fill-in-the-blank. Getting stuck with your focus on what you don’t have rather than what you do leads to buying stuff. When you don’t feel contentment, you look for it outside of yourself. But you will never find it in a new pair of shoes or a kitchen appliance. But this is how we think – “when I get this….I’ll be happy.” Which leads to clutter in our homes.
Happiness is available to you now and cultivating gratitude is how you stop buying stuff you don’t need (maybe with money you don’t have). You have to start noticing all you DO have and appreciating it because the reality is, it doesn’t matter how much money or stuff you have, if you can’t find contentment your cup will never be full. It can be as simple as writing down 5 things each day you feel grateful for. Or saying out loud what brings you contentment; a sunny day, your warm slippers, a hot coffee or your rain jacket that keeps you dry. This simple yet powerful practice will change your life.
3. Saying Goodbye to “Just in Case”
How many things do you have in your house ‘just in case’? This is one of the biggest culprits for clutter. We hold onto items because we think we might need them one day. I am here to tell you that ‘just in case’ rarely ever comes. I have decluttered ONE item that I could have used and it was an air mattress I had to MANUALLY fill. So really, I needed a new air mattress.
Don’t get stuck in this mindset. It is linked to scarcity and will have you holding onto 100s of items. There are an infinite number of scenarios where you could use an infinite number of items. I have found The Minimalists 20/20 rule super helpful. You are allowed to replace an item if it does one day prove to be necessary. I know I needed to give myself this permission. And you do not have to allow things to take up space in your home for years because you ‘might’ need it ‘one day’. This can be really hard to shift because it might feel wasteful or you worry about money. But the truth is, it is unlikely you will need any of these items and the stress created from having clutter is not worth it.
4. Parting with Sentimental Items That Don’t Add Value
Objects are not the same as memories but they can sure feel like it. Letting go of something your grandma made or your wedding dress can feel painful. But here’s the thing; unless you are using it or displaying it, is it adding value? Or is it just taking up space? And not just physical space. The emotional weight of carrying things that you don’t necessarily want but feel like you can’t let go of is heavy.
Shifting your mindset will make decluttering easier. You can preserve memories in different ways; take a photo, display the item or use parts of it, for example old shirts into a quilt. But you can also be really honest with yourself. Do you want to keep these things? Sometimes just the process of sorting through is enough to let go of a lot. And this process takes time. I found that going through sentimental items several times over a couple of years helped because by the time I came to the last round, I had practiced enough to know what I really wanted to keep and what didn’t matter.
5. Letting Go of Expensive & High Quality Items
This is another hang-up to decluttering – not letting go of things that cost a lot. Here the mindset shift that will make decluttering easier is understanding perceived value. Just because an item was expensive, like a $200 dress for example, doesn’t mean it has value. How many times have you worn it? Once to a wedding? But what about those $40 sweatpants you wear weekly, aren’t those of more value?
Breaking apart this idea that cost equals value is important in allowing ourselves to get rid of things we spent a lot on. Like any part of the decluttering process, it takes time to embrace. I know the clothes I spent a lot of money on were some of the last to leave. And depending on how urgently you want things to leave, you can sell those things that cost more and then save the money or buy yourself something you actually need. I made $100s of dollars selling my stuff and used it to pay debt, pay for my daughter’s activities and buy clothes that I actually wear. So let go of the idea you have to keep it because it was pricey. Nothing is worth your peace of mind and the calm that comes with more space.
So to recap here are the 5 mindsets and how to shift them:
- Scarcity: Practice a growth mindset and gratitude, look for ways life is abundant
- Lack: Practice contentment and gratitude, focus on all your abundance
- Just in Case: The 20/20 rule and practice giving yourself permission to let go
- Sentimental Items: Take pictures, use other strategies to use and preserve what you keep and allow for the process
- Expensive Items: Think in perceived value vs. real value. How much are these items adding to your life? Sell them!
Remember Change Takes Time
One day you’ll feel one of those shifts and it’ll be like it happened overnight. You’ll experience the ease of letting go, you won’t feel scared or worried like you won’t have enough, you won’t beat yourself up for spending too much on that sweater or force yourself to keep those dishes someone gave you you hate.⠀⠀
So keep going, the more space you create, the more space you have for life. You have so much control and can reduce your stress, anxiety and overwhelm by getting rid of clutter. Start by reminding yourself how you feel matters more than stuff and go from there. These mindset shifts do make decluttering easier.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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What’s your biggest mindset shift? Or your biggest area of struggle? Tell me in the comments.
